does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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