Christians are straight up FREAKS
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize