My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Everything about him screamed your future.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
