Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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