He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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