I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
