Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
