it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
