seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Randomize
