Don't you send me to vm
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
