how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize