we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
