I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Randomize
