what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
