Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
