Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
