Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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