Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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