I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
