Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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