is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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