But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
