did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
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