wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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