when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
