a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize