Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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