haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
