Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
