I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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