If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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