Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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