bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
My breasts were aching with rage.
How does one acquire holy water?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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