That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
