Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
