So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
