I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
