I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
