also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I understand Curling. That high.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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