how can u be prego again
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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