I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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