My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize