i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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