it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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