Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
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