I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
