No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
