She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize