awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
And then he peed in my hair
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
