in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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